I gotta say… I almost ate it.
Wow. I came to the comments to say “This one is certainly a departure from their commentary of real life. The Onion has always been absurd, but lately it’s been depressingly too much on the nose. At least this one can be funny, without being easily confused as real. Nobodys going to come close to falling for this one.”
And then you existed.
My sleep deprived brain: “Huh, I didn’t know Paw Patrol was German”
Well, influenced by certain German thinkers
At press time, the PAW Patrol writers remained silent about the episode involving the deportation of thousands of Chihuahuas accused of stealing jobs and crippling Adventure Bay’s economy.
Oh Onion, you need commas and maybe a preposition.
Where would an additional comma go?
Fantastic.
That was so good. I ate it for a second
mistakes Zuma’s bone for a gun, and shoots indiscriminately at the fleeing canine while shouting his signature catchphrase, “These paws uphold the laws!”
You can tell it’s satire because something so ridiculous would never happen in real life
Reeeeeeeeeeeaally hoping you dropped this… “/s”

Did they got inspired by the Safe & Sounds series from cyberpunk? https://youtu.be/BbCdUMOyRBM
These days I’m so relieved when they are Onion stories
Chase is a class traitor. Rubble is a MAGAt. Ryder is a spoiled trust fund baby from old money.
Zuma (they/them) and Rocky are pretty chill tho. I’d hang with them. Marshall is alright but man he can get annoying. And don’t get me started on Skye, her head is always in the clouds. Ryder has his own reasons for keeping her around, as billionaires often do.







