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Midnight@slrpnk.net to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 5 days ago

La-Z-Boy Introduces Adjustable Morphine Drip

theonion.com

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La-Z-Boy Introduces Adjustable Morphine Drip

theonion.com

Midnight@slrpnk.net to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 5 days ago
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MONROE, MI—Citing its ongoing mission to provide customers with the pinnacle of comfort and relaxation, upholstered furniture mainstay La-Z-Boy announced Friday that its latest line of Jasper Rocking Recliners would feature fully adjustable morphine drips. “There’s no better way to relax than with our luxurious recliners and a steady stream of opioids flowing right into your […]
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